pissed.

for some reason...
i really feel like beating someone up today..
so many things to worry about..
or am i caring too much?
shld i just mind my own business?:)
and i used to feel so sorry for you..
but at this moment..
nah.><
hmm... i edited 2 pics today tho..:D
yea..
thats pretty much the only thing that i can be happy about .
and this song..Can You hear Me? by TaeYeon
omg...so nice..XDD


and i also found out that i was stupid..
still am..
but i wont be anymore..
just wish it could somehow be possibe:)
i'm tired of being so useless.

emptiness

gosh..
i hate this kind of feeling.><

BBQ ..XD

hmm..
BBQ at frilla's place today was fun.:)
well..i was pretty high.xD
and i didnt help out much..very sorry for that.
enjoyed it alot tho.
quite alot of ppl turned up.
the food was surprisingly nice..xD
but we didnt get to finish all of them..
so yea..LOTS of leftovers..xD

and frilla's hse was HUGE..:DD
and her parents were also very NICE^^
her lil sis is also super adorable..xD

too bad didnt took any pics..
well..first, my cam sucks(2mepix==)
second, it was at night..at the park..so yea..:)
and as expected..we didnt get to do our sivik project..xP
and i still got PLENTY of yet-to-be finished add maths amd maths h/workT____T

and did i mention about how BIg the park was?
and there is this gigantic pond..
and big playground set..
where we spend most of our time..
playing..gossiping..crapping..xDD

...

anyways..today i was kinda having a problematic day..
but all my silly friends just made me so happy..and HIGH..xD
thx..even though they dont know whats going on..==

and bud..
i REALLY need to talk to you..
sorry for bugging you so much these days..
you're the only person that can help me now.
and i'm sorry for that..>< will stop here now. really very tired..== and i dont know what to write HERE anymore.. so yea.

and ARA..
you're ok..
i mean..you're a great actress..and you're talented and pretty and all..
i have nothing against you..
but you better dont get TOO close to my MAN..xP
looking forward to that show tho..hehe..
hwaiting lor Yun!!
the 4 of you too!!^^
and also waiting for heaven's postman to come out..XD

Thank You

i'm sorry..
thats all i can say..
i dont know why..
even though it was me who said it..
but somehow i'm the one whose world seems like its going to fall apart..
urgh..i hate myself so much!

i'm sorry for everything..
for not being couragious enough to even call you..
for not being able to comfort you..
i'm sorry that i'm so useless.

you deserve WAYY more better than this..
and no.what i told you was just some lame excuse..i think><
i just want you to know that i have always been true to you..
i always will be.

i'm glad we're still be able to be best friends..

thank you.

===========================================

and DADDY..
HAPPY BIRTHDAY yea!!!:D
thanks for all the care you've always gave us..
and everything you've done for us..
mum told me you've been facing alot of problems lately..
bt i hope you know that no matter what happens,
WE will always stand beside you..k?;)

wish that you will always be healthy and happy..and wealthy..xD
may all your wishes come true!:)

numb

the cold i feel in my fingers..
it stings..
yet..the pain seems like a relief to me..
atleast now i got something to distract me from..
all those silly thoughts that were never meant to be real.
staring blankly ahead..
me feet kept moving..
even though i'm all worn up inside.

how i wish..
the coldness that made my fingers numb..
can do the same thing to my heart.

i'm in pieces..
and i dont really know why..
i hate feeling lonely..
but somehow i hope everyone will leave me alone now..
just for awhile..


let me mend my own broken soul.

B.O.R.E.D+stressed?!!oO

ahh!!!
going to school is so tired and boring la..
tuition..homeworks..blahh..
haiz..today me ll and frilla also speechless ady..
==

so during sivik period..
the period that seems endless..
we cant help but bored ourselfs to death..==
until dno who go and start to stack books on ll's head..
haha..her head is the most stable wan..
i think because its flat enough..XD

anyways,
going to frilla's bbq party this sat..
then nxt sat got 3 events..
YE sales, chinese test thingy and majlis perpisahan(it was supposed to be on 7/8..TT
but gna miss chinese..cause crash w/ the majlis thingy..
luckily..xP..
cause i langsung havent touch that 3 books..OO

went to piano class today..
omg.i'm getting suckier at the moment..TT
ll arh..
i think i better go ur house everyday to practice..XD
its ok..you can just pretend i'm not there..
just ignore my presence..:D

hmm..have to clean the working room by nxt fri..
still dno where to start..==
meitin~~i need ur help..><

Man Utd vs Seoul
24/7/09
gahh.. i wanna watch..xD
hehe..wonder if park ji seong will go anot lerh?..
if he went then will shinki be there?xD

hmm..
been having alot of 'probs' lately..TT
...wth is wrong with me?!!!><

lol.. this is really long..><
and i'm getting tired..
eyelids falling...==
missyou~~xP


oh..and did i mention i ordered AA3 and Saiban Photobook?XD

:S

happy??
or worried??

shld i??
or shldnt i??
oO..

lots of things happened today..
found out some stuffs also..
shocking ones..><

everythings' so confusing now..
and i dont know who to turn to..
hell><><

tired:(

hmm..
ate sushi again today..==
and i dont think i want to have any of them ANYMORE..
atleast not in this few days..
or weeks?oO

today's duty was fun..
i really very mm seh dakk you guys la..TT..
when you guys leave..
you'll be left with a piece of me..too.:(

lol..
just now bro ask me go down see smthg..
turns out its shinki's video scope in channel [v]..XD
haha.funny to hear dom describing them la..
i mean..stuffs like that..
its more like a girl thing right??xD

and ll arh..
haiz..dno what happened to her..
duwan tell ME..or anyone of us..
go told someone else..
i've known you for 6 and a half years la ll..
and you'd rather tell someone else other than me or any of us?:(
oh well..it's ur choice la..:)
just hope that you'll cheer up..
if not i'll bore to death la...><
miss your sakai laughs...:(:(:(:(:(

you can trust me.

you do know that..right?

friday:)

~sooann,vikki,meitin,me,felicia,yimin,meiwan~





hearts<3


[ps:*i'll treasure you guys forever..thx for all the sweet and memorable times:)..
*and ll..stop emo-ing la..u made us all so worried..><]

sakais..XD

went to 1u today..
with frilla sooann geehuey szeshuen leemin chishan thien yik
haha..was so high today..
went to Toys'r us..
acted like babies..xD
then go play daytona..
gh flipped me twice without even knowing it.xD

and happy b'day yea darling..^^
12/7/09..
nxt year ny give you prezzie la..xP

haiz..library damn fan now..
rushed for 3 meetings today..oO.
yeah..
and for those who kena pick by me..
i'm really very sorry..><
kebersihan members all also sgnt kesian wan arhhxP

hmm..
really feel like getting a boycut now..XD
shld i??oO
bt scared ltr cnt grow back until so long and straight liao..><
oh well...

hehe..downloaded all the photobook pics liao..^^
happy lerh..no need save one by one..haha..


oh..
and btw, i want all the silly pics you guys took today!!!XD

temptation??XD

never thought that i would be tempted to touch a classmate's hair..oO...
haha..i just cant help staring at those soft and silky hair that looks like a big grassy field..
especially when they're under a fan or something..
its really like those scenes you see in a movie..XD

HIT-5..
sounds stupid..xP(no offence yea..just my silly thought><) a china boyband..oO. cant believe i would actually be interested in them..
but only the looks la..ntg more:)..
all of them also ok..got 1 really very shuai..xD
and 2 of them share the same bday as YUN&JAE..
高宇 /Kido-02.06.1989
杨帆/ZeMeidao-01.26.1990*(^^)
lucky them><

and photobook is OUT!(i think.oO)
got big pic ady!!=D
bt lazy save..xP gna do it some other day..
haha..spend so many time just staring at the comp this few days..
laziness..xP

ohmagodd

last weeked was BORING..
but some of the things that happened these few days really makes me feel like that la..==

lets start with saturday..:D
omg..saw so many of these pics ady..

blurr and small..TT
but i can still tell that they are so nicee..XD
cant wait for AA3 and Saiban Photobook to be released!^^

and our cute lil micky forgot to check his flyer before going up on stage..
haha..the more clumsy he gets..
the more i ADORE him!!XD


and saw a pic that REALLY made me go gaga~~XD

i think its a pic taken to promote both the shirt and the ring..
but gosh..
how am i able to concentrate on the products when i cant even take my eyes of that charming+electrifying eyes of his?!XD

and i've also found out a new way to kill gummy bears..
instead of just biting their heads off..
you can now try this..
throw it inside of a molton potassium chlorate..
and watch it suffer...XDXD


haha..
go search for a vid la..
and this experiment is also explosive..
so yeah..
dont try this at home..XDXDXD

=================================
ok..now its sunday..
hmm..
overall its quite a malang day for me..TT
lets see..
have to rush hwork..
then internet damn lagg and suddenly lost connection..==
at night went shogun..
eat till too full...until stomach felt like its gna burst..oO..
haiz..wasted 60 bucks thr..==
after that went home and did some execise..(more like jumping ard==)
them mm xiu sam disconnected my left knee..
ths is the 4th time ady..TT
luckily its a 1 sec thing and it joined back itself..
but the pain is already unbearable for me..TT

yeah..
it sucks..><

====================================
TODAY...
school was all rushing hwork..(and hot as usual==)
did an experiment..copper(II)sulphate(i thnk)..
accidentally touched it for many times..
then only found out its poisonous..oO

got the script today..
gna be playing a despo slut..><
yeah..funny..==

skip YE..
so finally can go tuition..XD
after that go 99mart..
saw a kid without pants..
yeah..you can see his butt and everything..><
i thought that was illegal..
well..it shld be..i mean its so DISTURBING la..
and it really OFFENDED me..><

reach home go search for this guy that i saw on epop yest..
gahh...another pretty boy..^^

his name is 连勋 btw..XD

ohyea..

and i just found out i got drop-skirt habit..><

luckily i'm nt a guy..XP

==================================

all i need

mum...
i just wanted to say i'm sorry..
everytime i have any problems or if i'm unhappy..
i'll throw all of them on you..
even though its not your burden to bare..
i'll blame you and say all those stuff that i dont really mean.
i know saying sorry after all those dosent mean any thing anymore..
the damage is already done.
and all i can say is...
i really am very sorry.

i love you, mum.

and bud..
i'm sorry i'm not a good friend or advisor..
bt thx for temaning me yea:)
if it wasnt for you..
i dno how the hell i can last till today.XP(sound so serious..==)

yeah..
i can slowly feel the distance now..
seems like everything i've held on to for so longis finally going to fall apart..
well..nothing last forever..
yet..somehow...i dont want this to end.


lol..
since when i become so emo wan><><>
(omg..tomorrow shinki miro con in beijing,china!oO..
gahh.gotta go grab pics tomorrow morning..if possible before the new batch comes in.XD)

rumusan..==

gahh.
so sien la these few days..
everyday also very tired..
but at night cnt sleep.
then go school damn sleepy..==

hmm..manage to finish all bm h/w and oral..:)
bt got more add maths and no maths now..TT
and just found out that today was the last day for our current probate physics teacher,
MISS LEONG..
who is really NICE and good..:)
mm seh dakk her la..><
i duwan that old USELESS piece of shyt to come back la...T__T

anyways, updated my com yest..(finally==)
msn and windows..
it looks newer..
but its still the same to me tho..=="""

DNBN..
starting to love that site..XD
too bad dont have enough time to go grab pics.(no mood also..TT)

hmm..been learning korean & piano this week..
bt all DIY la..
so..yea..still very cacated.><

ok..went to BU4's mlm bakat just now..
my god..
spend 3 freaking hrs sitting on that chair at the last row..
damn crowded and FREAKISHLY HOTT..
(i chose the wrong day to wear my new jacket..==)
anyways, dont have much comment..
i was pretty BORED honestly..
well..was sitting with mum and bro and in front of a bunch of shuffle lovers..
yea..
all i can do is sms at that time..

then wenyi performed..
haha..shinki's song makes me soooooo HIGH!!!XD
suddenly scream like hell lidat..
and scared the kid that was sitting infront of me..oO
(before that i was like stoning there la..)
and after that he dun dare sit infront..and kept looking at me..covering his lil ears..horrified.><
sorry arh...xP
btw, wen's crew performance damn yeng orh..XD

yea..then cnt tahan and went home earlier.
missed the 'zhong tou xi'..
the ending..the pros..
haiz..nvmind la..
really damn sien there..

then just now go view banyak unknown ppls' blog..==
sakai la me..haha
ya..
and now eyelids are gna close..><
nites..

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oh..
how i love the fact that just this one sentence can represent all the words in ma lil heart:)

不爽:)

LOL..

today went to school..
did something wrong?
haha.
look..
here's the story..
there's a SH girl in my class..
who's been STICKING to us(my gang of friends) for the pass few years..
at 1st i dont have much comment bout that..
but this year so malang kena same class as her..
she sit behind me sumore..
dammit..><
and now..
i really am IRRITATED.

we've been talking bout her..
bad stuffs la..
well..she leaves us no choice..
and that look on her face just makes you wanna slap her la!
but at the same time makes you worry she will curse you..==
yea..that weird and creepy kind..
ok..anyways..
was talking bad stuff about PN.AZIZAH..
our 'beloved' fata** pengetua..:)
below is the convo where things go wrong...

me:huh?she's really going to be teaching us SEJARAH??i duwan that fata** to teach us la...

ll:ya la..(i forgot what she said..><)

me:bullsh*t la..
ll:no..its more like..pig stew(smthg lidat..==)
me:NO..她连pig stew都不如啊!
ll:yea..you're right..
me:是啦..跟我后面那个没有差!(别)..[saying it super loud==]

*omg...

me:omg..lin lei..omg lin lei..
ll:...*avoiding me..==

then i laugh like a siao po lidat..
non-stop summore..==
ya..
its funny..
i really cant tell if i'm HAPPY..or SCARED..
but i think its mostly HAPPY tho=D..at that moment la..xP

yeahh..
leemin..
if you feel like making me ur idol..
go ahead..:D

ok..
gtg to piano class now..
hehe...
go see ll's sakai bunny..XD

yeah..
if SHE read this..
you and i both are gonna die..
together ll...together..:)

haiz..
after that going to watch transformers with dad and bro and mum..
GOLD CLASS..
another 2.30hrs gna be killed..
i know all he wants is some family time..
BUT..
i really dont think spending rm45 on a movie is worth it..
i mean i've watch trans b4..
and its really NICE;DD
but for me..
its still not worth the money la..==
and i cant believe how much hw can the teachers give in a week la..
want us to hand in by this week summore.
DIE><

bleeding$TT❤

phew..
just finish replying+saving all the pics in forum..XD
i know this seems lame
bt wth..thats what i LOVE to do..><

hmm..summary of this week..
went facebook.. finally.. haha..
but still damn blurr..
only adopted a panda and named it beekee..:)
and joined vampire wars?oO..==
yeah..its funny.
that i actually spend time wandering in facebook..XP

anyways... did the librarian test on thurs..
haha..no 100..but sure can pass 80 gua..hehe..

and took report card on fri..
mum forgot about it and only wake me when it was like 11.30..
and i'm like shyt.. the school ure close ady..
but luckily reach thr at 12.. and manage to get it..
but mum did ntg but help jatuhkan nama baik saya..TT
oh well..

results werent tht good..
but mum still took me and bro go eat sushi:DD
zanmai sushi!!!:DD
omg man..reach thr at 1pm lidat also have to queue..
haiz..
they should buy a bigger lot la.. ==
but the food is nt bad tho..
hehe.. eat till 100+.. 3 person only.. scary...

ok..so went shopping for bag after that.
shop for whole day..
walk till leg pain..(mum wear heels summoreoO)
then end up at the 1st shop to buy the 1st bag mum suggested..
haha.. was very nice..:) lovee it..

THANK YOU VERY MUCH ORH MI~~^^

sat went 6b reunion at jane's hse..
it was..weird..kinda..haha..
4 years ady lerh..
but still a good thing to get to see all of them^^
miss them lots la.xP

manage to finish tugasan harian today..:D
luckily..hehe..
then go eat paddington..
6 plates..
4 person..
so full..><
therefore after that go walk walk..
and bought a 50% jacket..
a jacket i spotted a year ago..
nw on sales.. mum choose for me summre..
lol..==

summary is..
bought a CHEER YOU UP shirt..=DDD
a pair of jeans..
a new baggie..
a new jacket..
a baby violet nail polish and nail tool?..(frm etude..XD)
a can of 2%(again..><)
and epop!!
got lot of me inside..haha..
spot me!!!xD

wow..
havent pend that much money for a long time ady..
been saving for shinki use only..XD
most of the above are sponsored by parents..
thx yea di and mi^^

and dunno why go watch checkmate just now..
i din watch before cause i dont dare..
and yea..
it breaks my heart la..TT
but..
still will support them no matter what they do..:)


gahh..
this is a long wan..
haha..will PO pics nxt time..
gtg sleep now..
hehe..and pls..
DO leave some footprints if you somehow passed by this lil blog yea..
much thx:))

gosh..i sound so despo><